Saying Hi – a lost common decency?

Hi.

I just bumped into another flat mate in the elevator.

I draw back in surprise not expecting to see another life form, and said “hey”.

She, rummaging through oversized leather should bag, sees me, smiles polite fake smile and walks out.

I didn’t take offence, it wasn’t a smug or snob fake smile. However, it neglected a return “hello”. This though struck me as I waited for the elevator doors to close on me. It dawned on me. Did she actually snob me, or was she too awkward to say hello?

My hair was neat in a pony tail, I was wearing a presentable dress and my eye brows were plucked. I looked together and trustworthy as another human stranger. Was I not “hello” worthy?

Has anyone else noticed or encountered this? Have we lost the art of polite etiquette and greeting strangers in a communal setting, due to the overture of communicating and face timing with artificial and electronic devices?

 

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Art VS Pornography question

I watched a show on SBS last night called Sex in the Worlds Cities. It was an awesome, sexy night-in SBS, thank you.

This episode was set in Berlin, visiting art/strip shows, sex services and clubs that are prevalent in the city.

My boyfriend made a comment which broached the question – what is it that makes nudity either art, or pornography?

At first, his responses were simple and aesthetically speaking, only considering the visual and concrete aspects; “pornography is cheezball”. While this is true in some cut and dry cases, it is not ultimately due to cheezeballness if nudity is seen as art or pornography.

You can have nudity that is not cheezball, but still pornographic – if it has an element of exploitation.
For example, child nudity where the photography has a high chance of being a product of abuse or exploitation. A child is too young to have the appropriate faculties to be able to consent to that activity. Purely law speaking, it is also illegal.

We narrowed it down – the difference between art and pornography concerning nudity is exploitation.

However, there was that infamous case of Bill Hensons’ work being brought into question. For years, Bill Henson produced beautiful photography of young adults, teenagers and children. The work was dark, moody, and had elements of voyeurism – being included in on a private moment.

bill bill2 bill3 bill4

His work was not exploitative, but more appreciative, celebrating and admiring the beauty of youth, the beauty of teen angst, the beauty of innocence. For years, his work was unanimously accepted.

Update the context – there is a new fear in the world concerning the threat of predators and paedophilia. The stars of Hey Dad, Bill Cosby, Rolf Harris – all pedos! Church leaders and priests – pedos! The images of young children and young teen girls are now brought under the microscope, and the question most contentious was put to his work – is this pornography?

Revisiting our previous thoughts – his work was not cheezball; not exploitative. Regarding the means of accessing his child subjects – he had said he had express permission, full disclosure and consent from parents – his work also served to passively admire, view-from-afar a certain beauty he saw in his subjects; was this still pornography?

The audience that view his work, some may have paedophilic tendencies and intentions, but that is not the responsibility of the artist. What he served and aimed to do – the meaning of his work – was to capture a delicate moment. It was not invasive or exploitative, which is the main vulgar aspect of pornography.

A necessary element of being exploitative needs a clear, demonstrated power exchange – the exploited are usually of a lower status, or have lower power and influence. The exploiter is never usually identified, freeing them from persecution and reputation. The exploiter has power over their identity, or the perception of their identity, while the exploited are used, scrutinised, analysed. The exploited are robbed of the right to respect and dignity, and are debased as an object to be utilised. The use is of benefit to the viewer and consumer, and usually not an agreed transaction with the exploited – it robs the exploited, and the consumer/exploiter benefit. The exploited may be paid, but that doesn’t compensate for later humiliation and social vilification (or, does it?)

Browncardigan.com had uploaded the old meme of photoshopping pornographic images to make them PG and SFW. I take offence to this image, and it pains me to display it. Despite having awareness of the context of this image, I understand the joke and statement of this image – but I find it irresponsible and hypocritical in general to find this image funny without recognition of the exploitative act in the first place. Also, to display this one image alone without the group of other images modified in the same way, it seems to be singling out the one female in the pornographic image:

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Browncardigan doesn’t entirely have an agenda in their curation. It is more of a internet pop-culture repository. Amongst other websites out there – lememe.com, fuckjerry.tumblr.com, endlessballs.com – there are many more to come to replace them. icanhascheezeburger.com is all but long gone in the the meme blog stakes!

Why I dislike this image – sure, it is old hat to say that pornography is exploitative, poor woman, what if she was your sister/mother/auntie; its been played out. However, to single out the women in this industry, and neglect to identify the men that produce this industry, consume from this industry, “act” and participate with the women in this industry are also to blame; however they escape the identification, humiliation and vilification that the female stars get.

The female stars do benefit by having an opportunity to make money in participating in this industry. Sure, there is an avenue for women who are inclined towards this industry, and I have no judgement whatsoever about them.

What peeves me, are the men who run it, consume it, participate in it – and also escape the treatment that the women get.

 

YES! This may be a tangent to my original question; when is nudity considered art as opposed to pornographic.

However, by asking if Bill Hensons’ art, or anything else produced and intended to be “art” is put into question, the ethics of the pornographic industry and the treatment of the participants in it need to be questioned further.

It seems the shame of society consuming these industries is enough to want to close up about it – neglecting the bigger issues or whether something should rightly be considered art or pornographic.

 

What do you think?

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Succinct Reviews: Work – Unity

kumbaya-office-300x226#werk

In my #werkplace, the company is divided into two floors of the same building. The two floors are equal in space and city views, but it varies in population: the top floor holds the execs, welcomes clients, and also houses staff that didn’t get a spot on the floor below.

My floor is filled to brim with staff, holds a few execs but they ain’t as big as the level above.

One deficiency I’ve become aware of – is the lack of unity and togetherness in this arrangement.

The secretary/first line face of the company lives on the above level.

We receive emails from this secretary inviting the whole company to Friday drink nights and a few one-off celebratory events.

The problem is… we get the invites from her. An employee that represents the admin of the company, not the leadership or decision making.

The actual “decision-makers”, and big guys – they dwell on their own level, and only one of them (the biggest wig), visits only to inconspicuously walk a round past the desks to check that we’re actually working. Never slowing down to a stroll with warm engagement – it’s transparent in its deception – he is watching us from a judging distance.. Not engaging or acknowledging his employees in this infrequent event of stepping down from his golden throne, he retains his supremacy by formally stalking the lower level, before swiftly departing, back to his mysterious exec business.

I see him, and smile at him sometimes, but I don’t go out of my way to kiss ass. I ain’t getting ahead that way. Otherwise I will quit, find a new place. My biz is about integrity, and results.

Overall, this counterfeit, phoney attempt at office culture is not effective – the big wigs never attend beer friday, so why should the staff follow?

Honest and genuine office culture would cut down on time wasting and dawdling, and create honest dialogue between staff about what is happening and what needs to be done.

 

We all remember a time working hardest for a boss we respected most.

 

 

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Succinct Reviews: Life – Birthdays

I had my Halloween birthday last night.

My boyfriend took me out to a surprise degustation dinner which was a lovely surprise. Combined with wine and beer from Friday night staff drinks, I was very relaxed and in for a good time.

Although we were seated at the bar, above a sink and next to a waiter computer, and a pretentious waiter that ignored me when I called “hey” to him (I’m sitting at the bar btw), we had a delicious and interesting dinner.

Later we caught a cab to my friends place, Adam, to have dessert and a night cap.
He had over a bunch of his female friends to have a very oestrogenised night. We shared tea and cake, it was lovely.

We departed close to midnight and my boy stopped the taxi for us to smoke a doobie in the park near our place. Aw, my boy; knows me so well!
Smoked in the park, watched newly met singles from a Halloween party flirty wrestling in the park, and then strolled home to use my birthday presents…

Overall I had a lovely, loving and warm birthday, without the stress and ego tripping of hosting a birthday party.

 

 

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Succinct Reviews: Life – Snappy Boyfriend(s)

This morning I told him about this song I love by Andy Bull, “Talk Too Much”.
I’ve recently become obsessed with this singer.

Boyfriend thinks he sucks, even at my discovery that his lyrics are all sad despite his fun upbeat style.

Was on my way out to werk, put my arm around him and asked him whats wrong, “Oh you hate Andy Bull?”

He said, “its too early for Andy Bull [8am]”
Dismissed me “go to school [werk]”

Its the day before my birthday.

“Babe – this is the last day of being 27, be a little respectful towards me!”

Old badger boyfriend didn’t give a shit. I pulled my bitch face and birded him, walking out.

Fuck snappy boyfriends!

 

I think I actually hate him.

 

 

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Succinct Reviews: TV – The Chasers’ Media Circus

the-chaserWondering why you haven’t heard of the Chaser? You’re probably from the outside of Australia.

I imagine the Chaser half-heartedly wanted a faint allusion to Monty Pythons’ Flying Circus. I can attest that this show is not like what I imagine Monty Pythons’ Flying Circus to be like; I haven’t seen Monty Pythons’ Flying Circus yet.

Okay, now
Firstly: The Chaser have pretty much owned prime time middle class comedy politicking – courtesy of their bitch, the ABC (Australian). Thenceforth, the irony; The Chaser making another gaudy, family-set themed, soft-hitting comedy show about politics/media… they are indeed part of this “Media Circus”. They’re even making repeats on the Merry Go Round.

Secondly: the lounging around themed sets that the Chaser have been gravitating towards (cf. the Hamster Wheel, Chasers War on Everything, the Checkout), long since CNNNN days 15 years ago, are an indication of the resigned attitude the Chaser have begun to take towards activism and change. General useless jabbering, arm-chair activism.

For late night wine and coffee comforts, the Chaser help keep you informed about cruddy Australian media, while sugar-coating it with enough harmless, light, vapid, meaningless comedy to pacify your worries before you settle into a dreamless sleep. This enables there to be enough material for the Chaser to create more lightly, fluffy, airy, family fun media mocking while they lead the whole mediocre show. They suck. I don’t say “get a real job” – I say “get a useful job”.

 

tl;dr – Media Circus? More like Mediocre Circus. 

 

PS. How pomo of me. And a self reflective ps. realising I’m pomo. Jabbering on the internet about people who jabber about important issues…

 

 

 

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Succinct Reviews: Books – The Womens Room by Marilyn French

Womens_Room_coverThis book! This book will change your female life!

Beautifully written, a cosy read following the intimate life of a woman named Mira – as she grew up, first loves, unknowingly being gang raped in a student bar, marriage, children, divorce, Harvard, second love, and the continuation of life.

I loved escaping into this warm-tea, love-blanket of a book. Cried finishing it, from the loss of knowing those characters any longer.

The banalities and tedium of life are celebrated lovingly and with tenderness in this book, never have I come across with such affection for the female experience. Enchanting and eye opening.

This woman is a talented writer and look forward to reading her other books: Her Mother’s Daughter, The War Against Women, Our Father, Beyond Power: On Women, Men, and Morals, My Summer with George…. CANNOT WAIT.

 

tl:dr – I RECOMMEND ANY WOMAN TO READ THIS BOOK!! Refreshing and real – this book is not pushy; it’s tender and reflective of real life. Do yourself a favour (treat yo’self)

 

 

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Succinct Reviews: Movie – Wish I Was Here (2014)

wish_i_was_here_-_h_-_2014Wish I Was Here, or better named as, The Swear Jar

 

I had watched Garden State back when I was an itty bitty 18 year old, and yes – I fell in love with this indie, anti-hero love story. The whispy ambience of the movie was smooth, suave and chillaxed to the maximus. There was drug taking, lithium and antidepressant references, hip parties, affluent apathy, and a quirky cute kid as a love interest.

Its everything I craved and thought what weary adult indie love was about. It was beautiful in its own little bubble.

Problem is, Zack Braff fans, that he hadn’t grown in those 10 years between Garden State and Wish I Was Here.

What he had developed was a pompous, selfish, Jewish artisan. He tried to be flamboyant, dreamy, and spontaneous.

What you get is a movie that really should have been renamed, The Swear Jar.

Why the Swear Jar? Well, there were a few fantastic posey scenes where Dad, the anti-hero saviour, decides to turn his swear jar into a rehabilitating “home schooling” adventure for his cliched odd-ball kids. The slow motion trio, triumphant dorky heroism, marching down the side walk with swear jar huddled under arm, out to buy their adventures.

The shy, obedient daughter is bought a purple shiny wig and wayfarer sunnies. The younger son is hanging around being delinquent.

There was even one bit where I didn’t think this movie dared to stoop so low – to crack a cancer joke as his daughter was wearing a coloured wig and he wanted to test-drive a sports car from a ritzy, expensive dealer. This shabbily dressed, devil-may-care charisma of a dad is great as a still, or an image… he is not a whole, rounded, 3D character, and the movie just flops around. Which then makes the movie quite static – a chain is only as strong as its weakest link, and his weakest link is him. Someone should have said, “Good-bye!” – preferably a squaky middle-aged red-head woman with librarians glasses (I guess I’m not always original).

Even more – to further alienate the audience, this dad is a disappointment to the Jewish community – oh how funny! Pensive scene where he’s sitting in temple with the Rabbi to talk about life… oi vay, save me the shallow MELODRAMA!

And Kate Hudson? Miscast much?

tl:dr? This movie is sploshing around in puddles – SHALLOW.

 

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